The opening scene of Offworld by Robin Parrish is the first time we see a recurring dream of Commander Christopher Burke, head of the Mars mission. Each time throughout the novel that the dream recurs, Burke recalls a little more of what happened in this episode, and it ties into the main thread of the novel quite nicely.
So, with no further ado, how does this grab you?
Red dirt filled Burke’s field of view. Not that it was much of a change. Red dirt had been all he could see for hours. Even the bright pinkish tan of the planet’s sky was washed away by the windstorm.
“Beech!” he called out, hoisting himself back to his feet as the wind spun him about. He carried a small black pack with a few meager supplies and some mission equipment inside. “I’ve got zero visibility! No orientation! I can’t see anything!”
Burke’s training fought against the fear creeping into his mind, against the rising panic as the wind fed more soil and dust into the crevices of his space suit.
Got to find my way…dirt’s building up…soon I won’t be able to move…
Would YOU turn the page? Why or why not?
(Check back tomorrow for a guest post from Robin Parrish on this very subject: Writing The Hook!)